A fall feeling.

In high school we called it “world peace weather” when we would drive around with the windows rolled down, our half priced sonic drinks in the cup holders and music blasting on the radio. The air was fresh, clean, the sun bright but not too warming. The crisp bite of fall would fill our lungs ushering in a sense of peace and belonging.

It reminds me of running around outside with all the kids in my neighborhood gathering in the cul-de-sac to play four square or kick ball or to throw pine cones at each other just to release all the energy we had pent up inside. I loved when our entire group would gather, kids ranging from ten to fifteen, nothing in common but geography. We would climb trees, ride bikes, and run around with out a care in the world. The only thing on our minds were how long we had left until the streets light came on and we had to hurry home.

When I was in middle school my sister and mom and I lived in a town home where I had my own room for the first time in my life. As soon as the weather turned towards cold I would throw open my window to usher in the wind. I had a CD player that held all my indie angst teen music and journals and paper scattered around with doodles, poems and diary entries. I had no idea what I was feeling or who I was but in that room alone, with the window wide open I would try to figure it out.

It also takes me back to my sophomore year of college. The year I got close with the friends who would stay with me longer than anyone else. We spent days outside hauling around pallets of wood for our homecoming bonfire. The days were long and tiring but there are bright spots of connection throughout. I can see myself in the back seat of Rubi’s car, a feeling of happiness bubbling inside me at the prospect of new close friends.

More recently it reminds me of laying down on the hammock in my backyard, trying to find some quiet and alone time away from my loving family. A book in my hand, my phone not too far away, just swinging back and forth until my mom’s face appears in the window to tell me food was ready. It’s how I feel now, sitting in my room with the window open typing this blog post. The weather feels great, there is music in my ear and food waiting for me in the kitchen. That fall feeling, of peace and belonging sits right in the center of my chest.

I love this weather.

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